By • Simone Vorster | Business Psychologist (PPABP) / Executive Coach
I was recently having a chat to one of my closest friends, talking about the days when we don’t feel good enough as a woman – those days where you think getting more Degrees will make you more credible; when you think that earning more money will solve your problems; when you believe that staying in a toxic relationship is better than facing the unknown and finding someone who treats you better Well Ladies….. I am here to tell you now that we need to ‘Cut It Out’ – CIO is the way that we move onward and upward.
This is the thing – we are who we are because well, we just are. So, let’s CIO and ensure that we step into our light and get rid of those things, thoughts and people that dampen our shine. Here is how we CIO:
Things happen for you and not to you – it may be a dire moment at the time, however, trust that the Universe has your back! I believe in miracles! Things always work out and you are good enough to receive total abundance.
Cut out anyone who manipulates you. I have a circle of strong women, from around the world, who lean in and support me. They care about me. They love me. They are honest with me. They listen to me. They tell me when I am wrong. They tell me when I am right. They seek my guidance. I seek their guidance. They are my partners in ‘crime’. They laugh with me. They remind me of who I am when I feel hollow and flat. Most importantly, they allow me to be me – warts and all.
We are like-minded individuals who connect intellectually and emotionally. Do you have this type of circle?
Everything that you go through is a lesson. Learn it once and move on or the situation comes back harder and faster to teach you
Everything is a possibility and that possibility is an opportunity to learn, grow and become courageous
You know those moments when you think it is about you? I am here to tell you that it is not about you – it is about the other person or situation so don’t take it personally
Find the ‘a-ha’ moment – the moment when everything makes sense and you finally figure out the ‘why’. I am experiencing this more frequently and more rapidly. It is wonderful!
Each day is a new beginning
Forgive yourself – let go of all memories and experiences that you think were wrong – trust me, they were a blessing and a lesson. If you don’t forgive yourself, you are hiding behind shame
Tell your true story – the one that makes people laugh and cry; don’t tell the story of shame and ridicule – those who are threatened by you already have
Validate yourself, validate yourself, validate yourself – what is your mantra? Mine is that I am incandescent and mettlesome!
Act on each positive thought – these positive thoughts are not random gifts; they are a sign for you to live your dream brazenly
Learn when to use combat and learn when to float – you can only control you
Step into your brave shoes and deal! Deal with whatever is stopping you from achieving your greatness
A mistake made twice is a decision – stop making the same mistake of thinking you are not good enough and get rid of those mistakes i.e. toxic people
Don’t continue what you won’t allow – respect yourself to know that you can set boundaries
Always have hope and always give hope
Do what is best for you – you matter no matter what!
Choose joy! Choose love! Choose you and make time for you!
You are not an option or a fraction – be whole and only let people in your life who accept your wholeness
To all females, let’s take the true meaning of Lean In and CIO to accept ourselves for who we are and not what other people think of us because the people that mind who you are don’t matter and the people that matter don’t mind who you are!
Step into your brave shoes!